can't seem to get anything right

I guess I just don't know exactly what to write. I feel like I must be the worst person in the world right now but I don't know how I could avoid it. I have aparently ruined a 14 year friendship over something that I cannot control. I should be glowing right now but instead I feel like shit because so far everything about my pregnancy has seemed to be an inconvenience to everyone around me. I don't really know how to say thatI am sorry. I refuse to be sorry about my pregnancy though. It has been said that I have been a bad friend so if anyone else feels that way please let me know. I never said that I didn't want to be there for my friends but sometimes you have no choice but to be there in a different way. I still want to be there for my friend but I just can't be there the way she needs me to be. I tried to come up with an alternative but if that isn't going to work then I guess all I can say is sorry, but I tried. 14 years is too long to just throw away. I am certainly not trying to be a bitch and actually I was only thinking about her and her special day. I did not want to be the one who ruined that. I guess I did anyway though.